Not in the Same Place

So Date #2 is done! He sent me a message on one of my websites. At first, I almost blew him off because he was younger. I rarely date younger guys preferring men my own age or older. They are usually much more together (not always) but it is usually true.

He continued to message me so I chatted with him via email. He seemed nice. We both loved music, theatre, movies. We were both avid readers and both worked in education. I thought this was a better match than "Jeff," the oversharer. Certainly, this had to work out better. Right?

So we continued to chat via email and also via instant messenger. I was really enjoying my conversations with "Ted." He was funny, smart, and seemed like he could really be fun to go out with one day. He kept pushing me so I finally agreed to meet for a Sunday coffee and Lake Calhoun time. We agreed to meet at noon. I wanted to meet at 12:30 but he said noon was better so I went along with it.

Sunday, noon, there I sat waiting. Five after, he messages me to say he is running late. I am thinking he is at brunch with his family so I accept that. I am not thrilled though because I hate tardiness. It totally infuriates me! My life in the theatre does not afford the idea of being late. As I get older, I realize that being late is not something I will tolerate for myself or others unless there is an emergency!

12:30, he shows up. UMMM, we could have met when I wanted, any who. I ask how Sunday brunch was and he tells me he didn't go and was just running late. This pissed me off but I tried to put it out of my mind.

We have good conversation but I don't feel any spark. He is cute but not really my type.

I begin to realize he is nice and we could probably be friends but I am not really attracted to him for several reasons:

1. He is not as driven etc as I am about work, etc.

2. He smokes (I am ex-smoker and I don't want to date a smoker).

3. He he is not in the same place as I am in my life.

4. He is also really into "Older" guys. I realize I am in my thirties now but I am not a Daddy and I have NOOOOO intention of being one. I don't want to have to spend my time guiding someone and having to keep their butt in gear. I find it ICKY to be honest.

Any who, he was a nice guy but "Ted" is not a relationship potential for me. I could see us as possible friends but I DO NOT see the spark there that would generate a future LTR beyond friendship. I need a partner who is more on my level in maturity etc and I am ready to hold out for that person no matter how long that takes.